*True Promises*
(Formally known as 'Deceitful Lies)
by Jill W.  

Author's note:
  So far, I have written a total of 17 stories, all with
nice, sweet endings. Mainly, nothing life changing to the
characters really occurred in them. But I was thinking
of a really good scene to go in one of my stories, but
that scene soon took over and developed into a story
of it's own. This story is a sadder, more gripping then
some of my others, and I hope it comes out as good as I
have planned it in my mind. So, here is my story - True
Promises* Note: I SWEAR , I really am a Neil lass, even
though in this story, David clearly has taken over my mind
- but only temporarily.

Chapter 1*

I stared down at the ring as it busily glistened in the
warm afternoon sun. I was between the two men again, but
this time is wasn't because of an argument, but because
of an offer of marriage.  I looked up at Neil. He looked
like he was dying to say something, but was forcing it
to stay in. I dared him to say it now with the look I was
giving him. He opened his mouth, but then thought better
of it, not wanting to ruin everything.  I looked back at
David. He looked so hopeful, his eyes warm, comforting,
and so inviting. They made me want to answer him the way he
wanted right now, in front of everyone, but I knew better
than to do that.  "David, can we talk about this later? I
don't think the children, with the way they are, should
be seeing this." I said softly. He nodded understandingly.
"I'll go finish up school." He said, then turned and left,
leaving me standing there with the ring. I looked back
at Neil. What could I say to him? He just stared into my
eyes, penetrating my soul. After a few moments, he galloped
away on Charlie.  **** I was standing at the corner of
the porch that night, my arms wrapping around the pole as
I gazed up at the full moon.  "Do you remember the first
time we stood under the full moon over on your schoolhouse
steps?" David's voice came to my side. I smiled.  "Yes, it
jeopardized my position here because of  Kyle Coburn."
" But it wont jeopardize your position now." He grinned
misgrieviously as he took my hands off of the pole and
into his hands.  " I'm sorry I proposed to you in front
of the children. I know that they don't need any more
romantic ideas in their heads then what they already have."
" It's okay, they already have been dreaming this up for
a while. " I laughed.  "I love you." He whispered into my
ear tenderly. "You still got my ring with you?"

I nodded as I took it out of my pocket and handed it to
him. He took a deep breath, then dropped to one knee. I
stared at him, stunned.  "I could never express my love
for you in words, Christy, but I think this should give
you a good idea. Christy, will you marry me?"  Tears stung
my eyes, knowing that I didn't have to feel awkward, since
we were all alone in the middle of the peaceful night. I
nodded.  "Yes David, I'll marry you." I whispered. His face
lit up as he sprung to his feet and grabbed me around my
waist. I laughed as he spun me around. When he stopped, he
just gazed into my eyes for a moment. His beautiful blue
eyes that I adored were looking as bright as the moon shine
down on us. David leaned down and kissed me before we sat
on two old rocking chairs. There, we decided to tell the
Miss Alice and Ruby Mae in the morning at breakfast, and
the rest of Cutter Gap at the end of church Sunday.

Chapter 2**

"Christy, breakfast is ready!" Miss Alice called up,
awakening me. I was exhausted. I had been to excited to
sleep. I tossed and turned all night, thinking about how
I'd tell everyone. As I looked at my watch beside me on the
side table, I realized that I only had gotten less than
2 hours. Groaning, I pulled the blankets over my head,
until I heard David's voice downstairs. I jumped out of
bed, and quickly got dressed, and pulled my hair back into
a ribbon as my curls stretched down my back. I glanced
at my ring, sparkling from the sun streaming through
the window. Excited, I ran down the stairs, and nearly
into David, who was waiting at the bottom of the stairs.
My eyes lit and I smiled brightly as he did the same.
"Not yet." He laughed, taking my left hands into both of
his. I nodded, then slipped my hand out and into my pocket.
At the table, I knew that Ruby Mae had not forgotten about
the advents yesterday, and had spread the news to Miss
Alice. Everyone was so quiet. I stared at my food, glowing
with joy.  "Well - did what did ya tell a€˜im? Come on, Miz
Christy, ya gotta tell us!" Ruby Mae broke out. I looked
to my right, where David sat at the head of the table. He
nodded, and I held up my left hand for them to see. Ruby
Mae screamed with delight and ran over to me, examining
the ring. Miss Alice stared at me, a smile dawning.
 "Oh, Miz Christy, that's the most purty thing I ever did
see!" The 14 year old exclaimed into my ear. I winced, then
looked over to Miss Alice, as a grin took over my lips.
"Congradulations." She said, but not as excited as I
had imagined. "When are planning to tell the cove?
"After church services, David is going to announce
it." I answered.  "Oh Miz Christy, ya cant mortally do
that! I caint keep it a secret that long!"  "Ruby Mae,
it's Saturday now!" I exclaimed.  "I know, but I jest
caint! Preacher, caint ya tell a€˜em today? How am I going
to keep it a secret?"  "No, and I'll lock you in the barn,
if you would like." David replied  jovially.

Chapter 3***

I was sitting in church, watching my fiancAc preform his
sermon. Now, the last hymn had been sung, and everyone
was waiting for David to dismiss them. Instead, he told
them something else.  " I have an announcement to make,
before everyone leaves. Miss Huddleston, would you come
up here?" David asked. I smiled sweetly as I walked up
and stood next to him at the pulpit.  " I would like to
announce our engagement. " He said, but what ever else he
had planned to say was drowned in "hoops and hollers". I
laughed as I seen some of my girl students giggling and
whispering in the corner.
 As they left, David and I stood at the door, and everyone
congratulate us with big smiles and plenty of handshakes.
********

"So, what day should we get married? I would like to do it
as soon as possible, but still leave room to make all of
your wedding plans." David asked. We were in his bunkhouse
planning everything out. He was writing a list of people
we needed to inform, as I wrote the names of stores that
I needed supplies from. I even wrote down names of a few
stores that sold nothing but beautiful wedding dresses.
" I'll need about a good month. Let's see, today is
November eighth, so how about November...November 16th?"
"Sounds good." He said, writing down Ida's name.  "Don't
forget my two cousins. And my uncle Matthew. " He laughed,
adding them to the list.  "Well, all I'm going to be doing
tomorrow is be waiting on the phone. You know it takes
forever just to call Ashville, I'll be on quite a while to
get connected to Boston."  "Be glad you don't have to call
Ida in California! But make sure that you get her letter
to Ben Pentland tomorrow, it's already going to take weeks
to get there. How about this, you make your phone calls
at the El Pano general store, and I'll call my family and
friends from the mission? It would save time. " "Alright,
but don't expect me home until late." He answered, putting
down his pencil and rubbing his sore wrists.

Chapter 4****

"Hello momma." I greeted into the receive of the telephone.
"Christy? Good afternoon! I'm so glad to hear from you, I
have so much to tell you!" My mother said enthusiastically.
" As it turns out, so do I."  " Well, the first and
most important thing is that your cousin Emily just
got engaged two, no three days ago to Lance Barclay."
My jaw dropped. Emily was my best friend, and Lance...my
good one. In his eyes, we were more than that - he had
proposed to me twice last year. He was the son of the
richest man in these four states. To my mother, and most
citified people, Lance was an angel. To reality, and me,
he was a bit less than that.  " I wish you would be in her
place. You went so well together, and he was so fallen for
you." She continued.  " I'm sure we did go good together
- he got in bar fights, and I got him out of them! Momma,
Lance was always getting drunk and hanging out in bars
since he was 15! He's so spoiled, and he hangs out with
terrible men."  "And still, I'd pick him over that Reverend
Grantland up there. " Oh no, what was she going to say?
"Momma, David didn't do anything to you."  " He sticks
his nose in other people's business - in my business."
"When?"  "When you're father had that stroke -" "Mother, he
was trying to help!"  "Well, I'd sooner pick that Doctor
MacNeill, being the mountain man he is, then David."
Now what could I say - that the man she was disgracing was
going to be her son-in-law?  "Um...I got to go, momma. Miss
Alice needs my help." I lied. Miss Alice wasn't even
here right now.  "But I have so much to tell you!"  " I
know, I'll get back to you. Good bye momma." I said, then
hung up fast. I leaned against the wall, and slid down it,
landing in a heap on the floor. As luck would have it, that
was the exactly the moment Neil would decide to walk in.
"Christy, what's wrong?" He asked, rushing up to me as I
began to sob hard. I hid my face with my arms. Neil scooped
me up and put me into lap.  "Is there anything wrong?" He
asked again.  "Everything." I whispered.  " Christy, I need
to talk to you. I heard about your engagement, and I got
to tell you that I think you're making a mistake. I know
that you're trying to prove to everyone that you don't have
a connection to me anymore, but this is wrong. I wouldn't
be saying this if it wasn't - the only thing I ever wanted
for you was for you to be happy. But Christy, the feelings
that I know you have for me make it wrong to get married
to David. I had to rid me of the feeling that I admit
had grown for you because of Margaret. But you didn't do
that yet. I know you didn't by the way you looked at me
when Grantland proposed to you.  I looked up at Neil. Was
that the real reason for this? When I looked into his
eyes, I could feel my heart beat wildly. I never felt
so comfortable than when I was in his arms.  Seeing him
again made me realize this. I knew that I couldn't argue
with him.  I cried harder and helplessly into his chest.
************* Days passed in a blur. I wasn't so excited to
see David anymore as I struggled to find out my feeling for
Neil and David. I did love David, I know I did. But have
I been in love with Neil all of this time, even before I
knew that she existed?  I told David about my mother not
approving of him, and we both struggled with that. Though
is mother needed some convincing, she finally gave him
her blessing in the place of his father. So now, we got
one blessing from one side, and the total opposite from
mine. Was it enough that only one set of parents agreed?
And what about Miss Alice - she was like a mother to both
of us, and she had agreed.  But the words the Neil had said
to me days before shook me. I knew he was right, which was
the worse part. But my feelings for him were now wrong.
I had to get rid of them, and get even closer to David,
without him knowing about this dilemma.  Now, I just had
to find out how to do that.

Chapter 5*****

"This dress is so beautiful. Wish I could have one so
fancy like when I get married." Ruby Mae said, circling
me. It was my wedding day, and I was all dressed. My
hair was piled on the top of my head, curls falling from
it. The dress that I had chosen was indeed beautiful. It
was a bright white, a slender top with a high collar
and long sleeves. My skirt was hooped, and decorated in
lovely bead pearls and lace that flowed to the floor.
David's mother and sisters swarmed through the house
and Miss Alice stayed outside, trying to keep sanity
around for a little while longer. Ruby Mae stayed by my
side, and since I was forbidden to see outside because
of  David already there, she gave me reports. I was
so nervous. Ruby Mae heard Mrs. Grantland, my future
mother-in-law call her from downstairs and ran to her. I
flopped down on my bed. Something was missing - my
parents. I had this empty feeling in my heart, knowing
that I was keeping this from them.  I had never wanted my
mother more than right now.  Everything started coming
back to me. Days after my decision to get rid of my
feelings for Neil, and finding a way to get my mother
to accept David, this was forgotten. As I result, my
parents weren't here to support me and doubts pierced
my heart. Mrs. Ruth Grantland came bursting in my door.
" My Ida did quite a good job, considering with what she
had to work with." She said rudely. Ida came in, along with
her sister Maigan, who was still single at 27, despite
how beautiful she was, with shining blue eyes and carrot
red hair. Ida applied more paint to my lips and cheeks,
and picked at my dress.  "Don't mind mother, she's always
rude like that." Ida whispered.  "MHz Ida, I caint get
in this dress - it's too tight!" Ruby Mae whined from
the next room.  " I see David!" Maigan yelled excitedly
from my balcony.  "David, hello David!" She called.
" Hi Maigan." He answered, making my heart race. I let
out a whimper.  "Calm down, child, you'll see him soon
enough." Mrs. Grantland said.  "Hey Maigen, get my fiancAc
out here!" I heard David yell. I plopped down on my bed. I
was going to be married! I sighed with excitement.  " Are
you ready, Miss Huddleston?" I heard Doctor Ferrand, who
was to walk me down the aisle. My heart sunk. My father
was suppost to be saying that. After all the girls wished
me luck, I took Doctor Ferrand's offered arm and walked
down the steps. Miss Alice was there, her eyes glimmering
with tears.  "Is thee ready?" She asked as she hugged me.
I nodded. Little Lulu Spencer came running downstairs,
her wreath on her head nearly flying off. She grabbed the
basket on a corner table and reported to me.  "I'm ready,
Miz Christy."  I laughed at my flower girl, dressed in a
frilly yellow dress. Little Burl came stomping down the
steps quickly too. He looked so charming in his little
suit. He was my ring bearer.
 "I'm already, Miz Christy!  Ya shore do look purdy." He
said, standing next to Lulu after he got his satin pillow
with the rings on it. Ruby Mae, followed by Ida, came
down, her face bright. She was dressed in a light mint
green dress, just like the other bride maids. Her red hair,
that went so wonderfully with her color dress,  was pulled
back in a high barrette, and flowed down her shoulders
and back.  Miss Alice peered out the door and nodded.
"Lulu, Burl, time for you to go down the aisle. Remember
all of Ruby Mae's careful planning now." She said
with a grin. I couldn't believe that this was actually
happening. My mind flashed back to the first time that
I had ever seen David. I had collapsed my soaked body
into David's arms after walking so far, and had seen a
hideous  operation. How could I have ever guessed then
that I would be falling into my future husband's arms?
"Alright, you're turn." Miss Alice indicated to the
bride maids and their partners. Ruby Mae in lead, took
Rob Allen's arm proudly and went out. I watched as Bessie
with John, Lizette with Will Beck, and Mountie with Isaak
McHone followed. But just as Mountie had went out the
door, little Iris McHone, now near a year old, stumbled
into the mission and went to me, wrapping her arms around
my hooped wedding dress. She couldn't talk yet, but she
lifted her hands up and went on her toes, and I knew
what she wanted. I lifted her up and seated her on my
hip, touching her pug nose lightly with the tip of my
finger. She giggled, then started fingering my dress.
"Get her down, she'll wrinkle and ruin your dress!" Ruth
said sharply.  "I don't care, this little girl is so
important to me, that my ruined dress would be worth it." I
answered, handing her to Miss Alice.  "Come Mrs. Grantland,
it's time to take our seats. " Miss Alice said, then they,
along with Ida and Maigan, out the side door.  I heard the
music for a€˜Oh perfect Love', being sung by Miss Hattie,
while playing the dulcimer. This was my cue. I took a deep
breath, grabbed my bouquet of deep red roses, and started
out. I looked all around me. The whole cove, along with
every one of my school children, was there, making the
aisle longer and thicker. My soon to be in-laws were
near the gazebo, where Doctor Ferrand stood, awaiting
to preform the ceremony.  I spotted David. He looked so
handsome. His new suit glistened as his eyes were aglow.
Beside him, was his older brother Robert, who looked so
much like David. As I got closer, I was shocked to see
who was at the end of the aisle on one side. Beside Miss
Alice was stood Margaret - without Neil. But Neil not
being here was to be expected. I didnt think that he'd
show, though I had hopes when I handed him the invitation.
I handed Margaret my bouquet, and took David's offered
arm, then walked up the gazebo steps. Once in front of
Doctor Ferrand, David and I joined hands as we stared
into each other's warm eyes.  Mine had tears overflowing
them, and David's went misty. After the vows were said,
rings exchanged, we were whisked away to the school yard
where so many tables were set up. David had to go to so
many places to get all of them. He had went to Knoxville,
Asheville, and Lyleton to get them on loan. I had taken
the desks and benches out of the school house, and put
them in two circles for the children, after Ruby Mae had
given the suggestion. There was so much food around, cooked
by many of the women of the cove. David and I were just
about to sit down at our table when I heard Neil's voice.
"Christy, can I quick talk to you?" He called over. I
gave David an apologizing look, then ran to Neil, a few
yards away.  "You weren't at the ceremony." I stated.
 " And you didn't do what I told you to do last
month. Christy, with the feelings that you still have,
I can not support this, which is the reason I didn't
go to the ceremony. But I'm here now to show you that I
support you."  "Well, thank you for coming."  " Could you
tell me one thing before I let you go?" He asked. I nodded.
"Why didn't you do what I told you to do? Why didn't you
let me fully go?"  "I..well... I guess I just -" "Don't
tell me that you forgot and it just slipped your mind."
" I don't know why."  "Then you have no reason getting
married. Look, I'm not here to ruin this for you, it's
the last thing I want, but I just wanted you to realize
a few things." He said, then turned and started walking
the other way.  "I do love David...I love him with all
of my heart. I'm not just marrying him for proof that
I don't love you."  "No, I don't believe you are. But
needing that proof in your eyes sure made your decision
easier, didn't it?" He said, then started walking again.
"Neil...cant you just stay?"  "I told you that I support
you, but I refuse to stay and take part in this." And that
was the end of it. We both walked our separate ways, just
like we always did.

 Chapter 6******

"Why didnt you go? David, how could you skip going to
El Pano, when I'm here, deprived of all sugar, flour,
wheat, cornmeal, sewing equipment, need I go on?" I
yelled upset. It was 8 months after our wedding day,
and even though things had started out wonderfully,
but was now steadily going downwards. We stood in our
bunkhouse, now our home. David had built onto the side
of it - added a parlor and a second floor bedroom.  " I
was busy. Christy, it's Sunday! I had to go preach at
the Cutter Gap and Lufty Branch church today. " "David,
you left at 10 this morning! " "And it takes an hour and
a half to get there, an hour to preach, and an hour and a
half to get back again."  "Alright, that's four hours. That
means you should have been back at 2, like you used to."
"Granny Faust in Lofty Branch called me. Everyone said
that she was dying, so I stayed and prayed there for her
for two hours, then stayed for another hour after she
passed away to comfort the grieving family. Christy, I'm
a preacher. The ONLY preacher for near 50 miles, last
time I checked. You know that I am in demand at these
times! It's not like you are couped up in here all day
- you're gone for hours at a time at Fairlight's cabin."
"I'm tutoring! Least un started school this year, and John
Spencer is working to get into college. Zady's grades are
slipping, and I need to help her. And did you know that
Ruby Mae is engaged to Rob Allen now? I doubt it, you never
ask about what's going on. I'm trying to help her prepare
to be a good wife."  "What makes you think you can? I
mean, this cabin isnt exacty as clean as it used to be."
I stared at my husband in shock. Did he just tell me that
I wasn't a good wife? I spun around and ran up the stairs
and into our bedroom as fast as I could, with David running
after me.  "Christy wait-" He said, but I quickly slammed
the door shut and fell onto the bed. My body wrenched
with uncontrollable sobs.  " I'm sorry Christy." David
said despritely.  " The worse part is you meant that!" I
said between sobs.  " No, I didn't. I've been on the road
all day, I'm exhausted."  "So am I! I visited 4 cabins
today, tutored 8 students, and came home to clean. I am
completely worn out, but I don't take it out on you."
"Don't you? Or maybe you're not taking out exhaustion
with me, maybe it's another emotion."  "Just get out,
David! Please!" I exclaimed.  **** Twenty minutes later, I
grabbed my coat out of the bedroom closet and went down the
steps. David was asleep on the davenport, so I just went
right out. I ran to the doctor's cabin and knock wildly
on the door.  "Christy, what's wrong?"  But my tears had
already told him. He took me into his arms like he would
do to his little sister.  "Did you have another fight?" He
asked. I nodded.  "My marriage is in ruins, and it's all
of my fault because I didnt listen to you." I cried. I had
done this many times before, Neil always tried to help me.
"I...I have to be better. David already accused me of
being a bad wife and dismissing my duties. What ever I
need to do, I'm going to do it. Please help me Neil."
 Neil, with one arm still wrapped around me, walked me
inside and seated me at the table beside him.  "Margaret,
could you serve up another plate for Christy? And some
tea too? She's cold." Neil yelled.  "Comin' up!" Margaret
answered from the kitchen cheerfully.
 As I was in Neil's embrace, I realized something. I looked
at him like a big brother, that's why I ran to him for
help. I looked at Margaret like my older sister.I backed
up and looked at him in shock.  "What?" He asked puzzled.
"I know how I feel about you - it's not like how I've been
beating myself over, it's like a sibling relationship. It's
been like that this whole time, I just didnt realize it."
" I know how you feel, and I've been waiting for you to
discover it too."  "At least that's solved. But what about
David? He all but has given up on us. He wont even go to El
Pano for me, and I'm all out of flour and cornmeal, among
so many other things."  "We'll supply them to you until
he gets there. Margaret said, put the dinner plates in
front of us.  " Oh, no. That's not-" "Didn't you just say
that you thought of me as your much older brother? Well,
then it's my responsibility o help you out every once in
a while. And now is definitly one of those times." Neil
insisted. I smiled.  "Thank you."

Chapter 7*******

After we had eaten, Neil told me to rest by the fire for
a little while, then he would take me home. But I rested
too good - I fell asleep! In the morning, I awoke to a
dark room - the patient room that Neil had built onto his
cabin just a month before.  I rushed to the heavy wooden
door and opened it carefully.  " So what did Grantland
tell you last night when you called him and told him
that Christy would be staying here?" Neil asked Margaret,
entering the kitchen as she made eggs.  " I didn't talk to
him, I talk to mother. But I can imagine that he didn't
like it very much."  "You told her to tell him that I
was going to be staying at the Holcombe's, right? I don't
want to be getting Christy in trouble with her husband."
"I told her. I sure am glad that Christy got everything
right again."  "I know her inside and out - and I know
that she figures out all of her problems sooner or later."
"With your occasional help?"  "Yeah. Same wit you. I
know what makes you mad, happy, sets you off or gets you
in a better mood. You know the same with me. That's why
we can get into such  big arguments."  "I'll agree with
that." Margaret laughed.  "Well, after breakfast, I'll
ride Christy back." Neil said, sniffing the gorgeous
smelling air.  " How about I do that? I wouldn't want to
push your luck. It wont look bad if I take her, not to
mention that I'm going to visit my mother. You need sleep
anyway, it's obvious you didn't sleep well last night."
"No, I'm worn out."  I wondered how I would enter the
situatation now. I didn't want them to think that I was
listening on their conversation. So, I backed up, shut the
door that had only been open about a foot, and opened it
with more force.  "You don't have to go out of your way to
make yourself noticeable, Mrs. Grantland." Neil said, not
even turning to me.  "How'd you know I was standing here
all this time?"  "Well, one - you just verified it. Two -
I just said it - I know you inside and out."  I rolled my
eyes. "I forgot you knew everything." I laughed, quoting
myself from so many times before.  " No, that's you."

Chapter 8********

Things between David and I got much better. I even gained
up enough courage to tell him of my confusing emotions
for Neil. He was disappointed and upset, but he forgave
me and we moved on. We both did our best to keep up with
our duties to ourselves as a husband and wife, but also
as a reverend and teacher to the cove. But it wasnt too
long until I started slowing down physically. I felt like
my body was letting me down slowly but surely. Then, I
started getting sick. I vomited constantly, I was dizzy
and weak - and scared. The Allen boys, who I have been
tutoring, were all sick and kept in bed. Could I have
gotten their sickness? Was it fatal? I have seen and heard
of so many diseases that sweep these coves - typhoid,
dysentary, scarlet fever, influenza, and list just went
on. Finally, one day when David was away and not there to
help me, I called for Neil. I hadnt seen him since the
night I went crying to him, which was over 2 weeks ago.
"Hello...Christy?" Neil yelled, walking through the door.
"I'm up here." I answered weakly. He headed up the stairs
and into my room. I gave him the list of symptoms, and
he looked me over.  "So what's wrong with me?" I asked
after he straightened up.  "I'd give you about 4 and a
half months left." He said very seriously.  " What! I'm
dying?" I screamed, and Neil doubled over laughing.  "Neil,
what's so funny? Why would you laugh about me dying?" I
asked angrily.  " I'm...sorry Christy." Neil began, talking
between gails of laughter.  "You're not dying, but quite
the opposite. You're renewing."  "In english, Neil -
please."  "Your pregnant!" He chuckled. My mouth dropped.
"What? You mean-" "You need simplier terms? Let's see -
you're about 5 and a half months along, the BABY should
be due in oh.... the beginning of September. I cant wait
to see the new family member. Oh, and since I'm like
you're brother, think I could be it's uncle? He teased
"I...I ...wow." I said stunned and nodded.  "Come now,
it's not like, and I mean no offense, that you havent
been getting...well, your abdomen is quite...swollen. You
couldnt have really of been thinking that you've been
eating too much."  "Obviously you have not seen me at
mealtime lately." I joked.  "Well, even though your
body is taking the pregnancy a bit roughly, it should
calm down real soon. But, now I need to get going -
Margaret said she wanted me home right after I got done
here. Congradulations, Mrs. Grantland." Neil said, then
left.  A few minutes later, I jumped when I heard a gun
sound off. But I relaxed again when I remembered that this
was Saturday - hunting day for most of the men in the cove.

Chapter 9********* "Christy, come quick, we need your
help." David shouted from downstairs, awaking me from
my nap.  The urgancy in his voice made me get up quick and
run down the steps. David grabbed my wrists and we ran out
the door. I was puzzled with the scene before me. Six men
were loading something big into Jeb's wagon. Once in place,
Jeb immediantly left at breakneck speed. The 5 other men
ran as fast as they could to stay near it, just like David
and I were doing. I was afraid to be running so fast - if
I fell, I could hurt the baby. But with David hand firmly
on my wrist, I had little choice than to do my best to
be careful as we ran.  Once there, I seen that it wasn't
just a few people who were helping - the mission dinning
room was packed with people. What was going on? What
had happened, and why would David give me just a worried
stare when I had asked him this so many times on the way?
"Ruby Mae, go get my medical bags, Jeb,  get a pot of
water boiling. Hurry, everyone!" Miss Alice ordered.
I grabbed Ruby Mae's arm as she ran past.  "What has
happened here?" I demanded, but she just burst into tears,
ripped her arm away and ran. Miss Alice was preparing
for an operation, but on who? I pushed past everyone,
and finally reached the table. I gasped in horror.
"No...No!" I screamed, not caring about anyone else.
"Neil, Neil please, hold on. Stay with us. " I begged the
pale, still doctor as I took his hand and held it close
to my face. I knew that it was bad - a bullet had peiced
his upper left part of his chest. He had blood gushing out
of him. I started crying against his cool hand. I looked
up at Miss Alice with a pained _expression.  "How bad
is it?" I whispered.  "Bad. There's an infection setting
in, and he lost a lot of blood."  "What does that mean -
he might die?"  "Yes."  I stared at her in terror. That
couldnt happen - Neil couldnt die. That's what I have
always thought - he would always be there, like he was
immortal. I shook my head. That cant happen - that just
cant happen! My vision blurred, and black blotches appeared
before my eyes, rapidly multiplying until I couldnt see
anything. The suddenly - I felt myself fall.  *********
"Come through, Christy, please. He needs you, and we don't
know how long he'll last." I heard David's soft plea in my
ear. I was laying in my bed that I used to sleep on here
at the mission, with warm quilts ontop of me. My eyes
fluttered open, and I immediantly remembered what was
going on.  "How long have I been out? Is Neil alright?"
"You past out a good hour ago. He's off of the operation
table, and into the next room. He's bad off. I think you
should go see him."  "Where's Margaret?"  "No one has seen
her."  I jumped off of my bed and ran into the next room,
bursting through the door. I seen Neil there, breathing
shallowly. He was still pale, and looked terrible.
"Did he wake up yet?" I asked Miss Alice, who was by his
bedside. She shook her head, and it was easy to see that
she was choked up. I rushed to the opposite side of his
bed. Miss Alice, knowing that I wanted some privacy, left.
"Neil, come through. Your wife needs you, and so does
this cove. So do I. It cant be your time yet, please, you
have to hang on." I begged. Slowly, I seen his eyes open
into slits.  "I...I'm not...immortal, Christy. Be brave
and strong, and take care of her for me." He said weakly.
"No Neil, you take care of her. Please, you cant die!"
"It is my time, Christy. Please promise me you will help
her with this. And please don't cry for me."  I shook
my head.  " How do I breath without you, how do I live
without you, if you really were to go? How do I survive
Neil? You cant leave me!"  "No, I cant leave you. I'll be
with you always. Lean on your husband Christy, he'll get
you through this. Christy, please, promise me that you'll
help Margaret. I promised her that I wouldn't leave her
if she didn't leave me, now I'm breaking that promise."
"I...I promise."  I said with a sob stuck in my throat.
I shut my eyes tight, trying to keep my tears in. This
was happening to quickly.  " Take care of Catherine Rose,
Christy. It'll keep your marriage full. Remember, I'll be
watching over you and Margaret, and the cove. Tell them
that for me."  I didn't know who Catherine Rose was, but
I nodded anyways. Neil's breath was more rapid but very
shallow. He started to shut his eyes.  "No, no Neil, not
yet, please not yet." I cried.  "Be strong and brave. Take
care of yourself for your family." He muttered so softly I
could barely hear. His eyes were shut, and I grabbed his
hand and squeezed it.  "Neil..." I whispered, but breath
no longer escaped his mouth.  "No, no God please, you
cant take him from us. Please spare us!" I pleaded, but
Neil just laid there limply. How could this be happening?
From my sobs, Miss Alice heard and rushed in.  "He's gone,
Christy." She spoke softly. I bowed my head as tears began
to fall rapidly. How could I have been so ignorant this
morning? I awoke thinking that this was going to be a
lovely day, when it just so happened that it was the most
tragic one of all.

Chapter 10**********

" I don't think I can do this, David. " I said weakly at
the train station. It was the day after Neil's death, and
everyone was in dispair. We were headed to go make funeral
arrangements and to get a head stone.   Margaret, who had
begged me to come with her,  was near by, her face buried
in her mother's shoulder. David was behind me, his arms
wrapped around my stomach lightly.  " I know how tragic
this is, especially to you and Margaret, but you need to
stay calm. Too much stress could cause you to lose the
baby." David replied softly as the train chugged closer.
" Are we going to tell my parents that we are married
and that I'm pregnant?" I asked.  "Christy, that's your
decision. If you want to tell them, I'll stand right beside
you and defend any harmful words that might be spoken
against us. If you decide not to, then that will be alright
too."  ********** "Momma, I want to thank you for letting
us all stay here. It's been so hard for us all, and you
taking care of the boarding was at least a small load that
we could unburden.  "My pleasure. Anything that I can do to
help out Mrs. MacNeill with her loss, just let me know and
I'll do it." My mother said kindly. I hugged her and went
to my bedroom, where I slipped into my nightgown. I had
been wearing loose blouses so that I wouldn't show, but in
this silk nightgown, I could see that I was getting quite
big. I admired myself in the full length mirror, and tried
to imagine the baby that was growing inside of me. A wave
of sadness washed over me. Neil had said that he wanted to
be the baby's a€˜uncle.' He said that he couldn't wait to
see it. Now, he would never.  I went and laid down in the
bed. How I wished David was here to console me. Last night
in the bunkhouse, he had been such a help. We had stayed
up all night in the parlor, and he held me as we rocked
together on the old rocking chair. Instead of wallowing
in sorrow, David helped me to laugh as we both recalled
funny things that Neil had done. But now he wasn't here
because I had not told my mother yet about our marriage -
therefore, we couldn't go sleeping in the same room. So, he
stayed in George's old one beside of me, as Margaret and
Miss Alice cry together in the room alittle farther down
the hall.  "Christy?" I heard a whisper.  "David? David,
you cant come in here."  " No one is up still, I heard your
mother go into her bedroom already. How are you doing?"
"Terribly. I can only imagine how Margaret is holding up."
" Things can only get better from here. The two of you
seemed to have hit rock bottom, and now you have to build
up again." David said, sitting on the bed and taking
my hand.  " Oh David, I just cant believe that Neil is
really gone. He told me not to cry for him, but how can
I not? It hurts so badly! " " He isnt gone, Christy. He's
still alive. He's in heaven with the Father, and his first
little son. And he's watching over all of us."  "But he's
not here in flesh and blood."  "No, he's not. And he never
will be again. But your sister Amelia, she isnt here in
flesh and blood, but look how you tell everyone that she
is in every one of your students. So, why cant the doctor
be like that?"  "Because it's different, I suppose. I
don't know, I just know that this hurts so much that I can
hardly stand it."  David took me into his arms and rocked
me softly in the light of the moon streaming down through
my curtains until I fell asleep.

Chapter 11***********


 For many nights after this, I couldn't go to sleep without
crying and David coming in to help me out. After I fell
asleep though, he went into his room all alone, and I
could see that it was taking a toll on him, though he never
mentioned it. He wasn't used to sleeping alone, therefore
he barely got any at all. I knew by the way my mother was
acting that she had seen David come into my room more than
once, and was wondering what was going on.  We have been
in Asheville for 2 days now, and none of us missionaries
had left the house yet. Margaret was still in shock, so
she was alright so far. Me however, wasn't taking it good
at all. David could only help me so far, and so could my
conscious warning me about the health of the baby.  We'd be
heading back soon, and I wondered how I would be able to
take it.  "One day at a time" was what I kept repeating
to myself.  **********************************************
"What's to happen to Margaret? She always hated being
alone in that cabin when Neil didnt come home. Now, he'll
never come back. She cant stay at the mission, that is too
often empty. Miss Alice is constantly leaving, and Ruby Mae
is going to get married any day now. That mission is big
and lonely, and will only echo sad memories off it's dull
walls." I asked David. I leaned close into his chest as he
wrapped his arms around me and we watched the automobiles
and horses going back.  " We'll figure out something." He
said, his head resting on my left shoulder.  "Christy,
I'm worried about you. You're under too much stress, and
you barely eat or sleep. I need you to keep in shape for
the baby."  "I know, David. I'm doing my best. The problem
is, I can still see Neil on the operating table, and on his
deathbed. I cant eat or sleep after that.Not to mention the
morning sickness and the queasiness when I smell food."
"Christy, can you come down here and help me prepare
supper?" My mother called, causing me to wince. I really
didn't want to move. I was so comfortable in my husband's
arms. But, I forced myself up, gave David an apologetic
face, then went down.  "Yes momma?" I asked, entering
the kitchen.  "I need you to start serving. The chicken
is on the counter to your left, and the vegetables are on
the table." She directed. I held my stomach - I felt sick
again. When the scent of chicken hit me, I immediately
dropped the serving spoon that I was using to dish out the
corn and ran up the steps and down the hall until I got
to the bathroom. Crouched over, tears stung my eyes. I
soon realized that I was fine, and nothing was going to
come up, and I opened the door. There, stood my husband.
"You alright?"  I nodded.  "I wish I could help you, but
this is out of my hands."  "Which situation - my body or
my lies?"  ******************************** I came back
downstairs at supper to try again. Margaret looked sick
too, and I hoped that her health wasn't dropping because
of her depressed state. Miss Alice's eyes were red and
watery as she took her seat across from David and I, and
next to her daughter. My parents sat at either end of
the table. I held my breath, praying that I could stand
this meal. But, it wasn't to be. I ran up the steps and
into the bathroom again, were I started vomiting hard.
"Christy, are you alright? Should I call Doctor Brant?" My
mother asked worriedly.  "I'm...I'm fine." I said, my body
still heaving.  "Well, if your sick-" "I'm not sick - I'm
pregnant!" I yelled annoyed.  "That cant be, you're not
even married."  My body had settled down, so I laid down on
the carpeted floor sprawled out, and got ready to explain.
"Yes I am - momma, I married David 8 months ago. I'm
7 months pregnant."  "And you didn't tell me about the
most important advent in my life why...?"  "You wouldn't
accept David, when I knew he was a good man, and what
God had intended to be."  " How could I not accept him
when I didn't even know about this wedding?"  "You didn't
need to - you had rejected him already. Remember when I
called you and you told me about Emily getting engaged to
Lance? Remember what you said? Well, that was the phone
call that was going to tell you about my engagement that
had happened just days before."  "Who all was there?"
"I don't see why-" "Who all?"  "David's parents and
siblings, the cove, Miss Alice, Margaret, and...and...and
Neil."  I turned my head as a single hot tear fell. "I
miss him so much." I whispered."I'm sorry momma, I know I
shouldn't have deceived you like that,  I just...I just..."
I couldn't talk anymore. Sobs overwhelmed me.  "Come on
out here, Christy." She said softly, and I stumbled to get
up. With red eyes, I fell into her warm motherly embrace.

Chapter 12************

"How's Margaret doing? She mostly stays in her room, and
I don't dare go into that sacred territory. David asked
me that night. He was now allowed in my room, since my
mother now knew what was going on.  "She's doing the
best she can. I'd advise that you stay away though, she
needs her space, and when she don't, only her mother can
really comfort her. I just make sure that she eats and is
getting sleep - taking care of her just like I promised."
"Promised who? Neil?"  I nodded.  "What did you-" "I don't
want to talk about it." I interrupted.  "That's what you
always say when I try and ask you what happened. I just
want to know what he said. I think Margaret would like
to know sometime too."  "I know David, and it's not like
I'm purposely keeping it from you, it just hurts so much
to think of it."  "Maybe it would help if you told me."  I
remembered back to last year, when Margaret had first shown
up and Neil arrived at my school house to apologize to me
for shutting me out.  "Sometimes it don't help to talk." I
repeated his words.  "But sometimes it does." David replied
softly.  "Alright, he said a lot of things."  "Like..." He
persuaded.  "Like...like he made me promise that I'd take
care of Margaret for him, and our baby. He said that God
did have a reason for our marriage, and that I shouldn't
cry for him. He told me to tell everyone that he'll be
watching us, and will always be there."  "Wait, did he..."
"Guess so. Sure seemed like he believed with how he
said things."  "Did he say anything else?"  "To be brave
and strong."  "I think you're living up to that promise."
"I don't. I'm failing him and I know that. Yet, I cant
stop." A few tears escaped down my face.  "It's alright
Christy, let's just go to sleep." David comforted me.
****************************************************
 Just before the early rays of dawn began to appear, I
slipped out of David's arms and went to the bathroom,
and locked myself in it. I hadn't slept at all - I stayed
awake thinking about all the memories of Neil and I - good
and bad - as David's light snoring kept a rhythm next
to my ear. How I wished that I hadn't argued with Neil
all those times. I wasted so much time be angry at him,
lying and deceiving him, when I could have been spending
more joyful times with him. It never occurred to me that
I might not be able to be with him one day. That day by
the river as we danced - how was I to know that less than
a year away would come that man's death? I was so sure
that he would always have his strong arms opened for me
to cry into when something went wrong, but they weren't
there anymore. He wasn't there anymore. He was gone, and
I would never see his face on this earth again. He would
never be able to doctor to his cove and people, never
be able to hold his scared wife, never be able to teach
the children chemistry and watch Zady Spencer grow into
the scientist that he had helped so greatly train. But
the saddest part of all was that he'd never be able to
finish his dream of finding a cure for trachoma. All
of his work was for nothing. It was a waste of so many
precious hours.  His life was a failure. His laboratory
made no difference now - he never got the chance to fulfill
his dreams. An empty feeling was casted into my heart.
"Why did this have to happen, Lord? Why did you take
him? I don't understand - Neil had so much going for him,
so much that is now left unfinished. He had just patched
up his marriage with Margaret! Lord, please help me to
see why You had to take him. I want to know so badly,
because I just...I just don't know what to do anymore." I
whispered, but my words were jarbled because of my sobs.
*********************************************************
"Christy? Christy, what's wrong?" David asked outside
the door. I looked out the window - it must have been
at least 2 hours later, and I hadnt been able to stop
crying yet or get the awful thoughts and images out of my
mind. I didnt answer David, I was so worked up by this
time that I could barely breath.  "Christy, unlock the
door, I'll help you with this." He pleaded, but it was
left unanswered.  "Christy, please..."  "What's wrong,
David?" I heard my father ask.  " I think something is
wrong with Christy, but she wont answer me or let me in."
"Girlie, can you hear Are you hurt....alright, I'm getting
the key." I heard my father say.  But as I listened to
the key fumble itself  inside the lock as the minutes
passed, I realized that there was something wrong.  "It's
jammed." My father muttered angrily.  "Well, I don't have
time for this! Christy could be hurting while we are just
standing on the other side! William, stand back. Christy,
if you're near the door, back up." David warned, then I
heard the repeating slams of his shoulder colliding with
the door. It took him a few minutes, but David was very
strong, and living in Cutter Gap gave him an even better
work out. I knew this door, as heavy as it was, was no
match for my husband. David finally broke through, and ran
to my side, kneeling down. He opened his arms intending
for me to go in them. I liked the idea, so I also slowly
opened wy arms, turned from the side of the bathtub, and
flung my arms around David's neck as I buried my face hard
into his shoulder, tears beginning to soak his shirt.

Chapter 13*************

"I don't know how Margaret is going to go back to Cutter
Gap. Neil is written on every stone and tree there, and
there are hundreds of each every where you look." I said
to David. We were lying in bed, and the sun was shining
bright. I had calmed down from being so upset 3 hours
before in the bathroom, but now so many questions filled my
mind, still not allowing me to sleep. David tightened his
grip around me, pulling me closer as he groaned lightly. I
knew my many questions were getting on his nerves, he had
gotten little sleep too, and he was hoping to gain those
precious lost hours back now.  "Can't we at least talk
about more cheerful things if I have to stay awake? We
always talk about Margaret, just...cant we make a change
this once, and then go back to Margaret later? Cheerful
Christy, can you do that?" He pleaded despritely.
"Cheerful? What could be cheerful when Neil is..."
"Christy, your life can not stop just because Neil's heart
did!"  "Cant help it. Everything seems to have lost it's
glow. Everything is dull and grey, replacing the vibrant
colors that used to fill me."  " Well, how about we talk
about the baby?"  But I couldnt. I burst into tears when
I remembered how Neil wanted to act like he was the baby's
uncle, and how much he wanted to see it. Neil made sure he
told me to take care of this child - he knew how much of a
difference it would make. Perhaps, the baby would help me
out of this sad period. No luck yet.  " Cant you even think
of names?" David asked with a symathetic tone. I shrugged.
"How about Ruth for a girl?' He asked. I shook my head
fearsly, then looked over at my shoulder to see him.
"Sorry, but I cant name my girl after your mother."  "I was
teasing. Do you like...Ida?"  "No. I cant name her that
either."  "Well, I don't know much about girl names, so
you list some off."  " I havent really thought of them. I
mean, I had millions when I was little, but they change
with the wind. So now, I'm not really sure."  "How about
for a boy?"  "I would like to give you a namesake if it
was a boy."  " I don't know, two Davids in one house?"
"Well, there's a lot of nicknames for David too - like
Dave, Davy, Dade; it would be perfect - if you like it."
"It does sound nice. A little Dade. Yeah, that goes pretty
good - Dade Grantland. Why didnt my mother think of that
nickname?"  I laughed.  "Never, city boy. Dade is fine for
a boy in Cutter Gap, but proper and prim Boston, one of the
largest cities in the United States, I don't think so."
David laughed. "Suppose so. You know, I was thinking -
maybe you and Margaret should go shopping. It would do a
world of good if you werent so shut up in this house. Fresh
air would be the best medicine. Besides, you're going to
need more clothes as you get further and further into your
pregnancy."  " Alright, I'd love to."  "Lunch time!" My
mother yelled up the steps. David and I, still in our
nightclothes, jumped out of bed when we realized the
time.  ************************************************
"Hello Margaret. " I greeted. David and I were walking
down the hall, now properly dressed, when Margaret and
Miss Alice, both with their eyes just half way open,
their shoulders sagging, coming out of their room.
"Hi Christy, David." She replied, and I knew she could
barely stand up. She was taking it hard, and I felt so
bad for her.  When we were seated at the table, I just
stared at my food for a moment, testing my stomach. My
mother had made cold chicken sandwhiches and homemade
chicken noodle soup. So far, I was doing quite well. But
when I looked across the table, I seen that I couldnt say
the same for Margaret. When she started turning a shade
of green, she ran as fast as she could up the stairs and
into the bathroom. Worried, I ran after her, and waited
outside the door until she finished.  "Do you need a
doctor?" I asked through the door.  "I'm fine." She said
then opened the door. "I'm pregnant."  "What? Really? How
far along?"  "Six months."  She said, then pulled her shirt
tight around her stomach to show me how big she was. My
mouth dropped.  "You're bigger than me!" I exclaimed in
a hushed whisper. She nodded.  "I know. But then again,
even though I have nothing to show for it, I did have a
baby before, and this is my second pregnancy."  "Did you
tell your mother yet?"  "Didnt tell anyone but you."
"Did you tell..."  "I never got to. Ruby Mae stopped by
to collect more medicine for the mission, and I told her
to tell Neil on her way back to come right home. Now,
I don't even know if she ever reached him in time."
"She did, I know she did. Neil told me that he had to leave
right away because you wanted him home."  Margaret wiped
away a tear from her eye, then smiled weakly.  "When are
we going shopping?" She asked, determined to not let
saddeness get the best of her. I admired that. How stong
she was! I slipped my hand in hers.  "How about right now?"
******************** Together, we walked down the steps and
back to the supper table, where everyone comtinued to eat
silently. Margaret stood back a little, but David offered
his hand for me. I took it, and he pulled me close to the
back of his chair, staring up at me.  "Is she okay?" He
asked softly. I nodded.  "We're going to go shopping now."
"Alright, but be careful. I don't want anything to happen
to you."  "Nothing will, don't be such a worrier."
"Why does that worry me? Oh yes, because the last time
you told me that was when you and some of your class got
lost in a forsaken cave while the whole cove searched
for you."  "David Ambrose Grantland! I exclaimed. "One
- I pride myself  in saying that I did not get
lost...just...stuck. And two - this is not a forsaken cave,
but citified Asheville."  "With my wife pregnant, it don't
make that much of a difference. Just be careful, Christy."
"I will."  David dug into his pocket, then placed some
money in my hand.  "Will that be enough?"  I smiled and
shook my head.  \"Margaret's pregnant too, she'll need
clothes." I whispered, bending down.  With that, David
handed me more money. I put it in my pocket, but just as
I was leaning down to kiss him goodbye, I was painly aware
of everyone watching me. So, I quickly kissed him, grabbed
Margaret's wrist, and rushed out of the house.

Chapter 14**************

Margaret and I had visited six stores so far, and had
bought quite a lot. Two bags were attatched to my left
arm, and one big one was on Margaret's. Now, we were at yet
another clothing store. I was looking at a pale blue dress,
as Margaret looked at others close by.  "Christy..." I
heard her call sadly.  She was holding a sleeve that
belonged to a all black maternity dress.  She looked over
at me with a tear hanging on her eyelashes.  " I guess
I'll need this, wont I?" She asked painfully.  I nodded
lightly. Not wanting to shop at this store anymore, we
quickly purchased it and went out. But it was then when I
could tell that Margaret was getting dizzy and lightheaded.
"Margaret, there's a bench over there, how about you rest a
little?" I said, pointing to a wooden public bench that was
about 5 feet away. Margaret nodded, holding her head. She
started walking over, but she never made it there.
*************************************************** "Is
she going to be okay?" I asked the obstratition doctor.
" She amazingly didnt hurt anything when she passed out,
but I did find out something that Mrs. MacNeill is unaware
of, that will affect her pregnancy." He said softly,
motioning for me to follow him out to the hallway. This
scared me, and I immediantly started panicing.  "Is there
something wrong with the baby? Oh, please don't say
there is. She'll only be able to have this one child. She
wont ever be able to have more than that." I was on the
verge of tears. This was Margaret's only chance to maybe
give Neil a namesake and keep the MacNeill name going.
" Actually, she will be able to have more-" "No, see,
her husband died, and so, she can only have one."
"I'm well aware of her situation. But, if she stays
healthy-" "It doesnt matter if she stays healthy or
not because-" "christy, let me finish a sentence. I'm
not talking about other pregnancies, I'm talking about
this one - I heard two heart beats."  "Twins?" I said in
shock. "Does she know? Are they both okay? How far is she?"
The doctor chuckled.  "They're both healthy and well. She's
a little more than 6 months, and as far as she knowing
or not - I thought you'd like to tell her."  I turned and
began to run in the room, but Doctor Edwards stopped me.
"Christy, I've known you all of your life. Actually, since
I was your mother's obstratition, I've known you longer
than that. So, I don't want to see anything bad happen to
you. I know how much Doctor MacNeill's death has put stress
and emotional pain on you, but I need you to stay calmer
than you are now. If you don't start eating and resting
more, along with taking it easy, you could lose this
child, and I would hate to hear of that. Instead of taking
care of Mrs. MacNeill, you need some one to take care of
you, because your body is taking this pregnancy harder
than normal. Promise me, Christy, that you'll take care
of yourself."  I nodded. "Alright." I said lightly, but I
knew that I couldnt live up to it. I had promised Neil that
I would take care of Margaret, and that was what I intended
to do. But Neil gad also told me to take care of myself
for my family. But how could I do both.  "It's alright
to ask for help. You wont be any less of a person if you
do." I remembered Neil saying to me.  I nodded again,
then went into the room that Margaret was staying in.
********************************************************
"I don't think I can do this. There's to many memories to
face too soon." I told David. It was the next day, and
we were heading back to Cutter Gap. Right now, we were
waiting for the train at the station.  "It didnt think
you could come here either, but you did." He replied
softly, gazing into my eyes and pulling me closer for
warmth. It was so cold out, and the freezing wet wind
penitrated through our coats.  "It's different this
time - I;m going to face my nightmare. My mother isnt my
nightmare, just someone I feared momentarily. I'm going
to be living again at the place next to where Neil was
shot."  "Christy-" "You realized that he was murdered,
right? Neil was murdered. The marshals confirmed that. I
got a telephone call late last night after you had fallen
asleep - the marshal said that they caught the men. The
men that murdered Neil. He was murdered." I said with
tears breaking loose. I had to keep telling myself that he
was murdered, because it refused to regester in my mind.
"Exactly - they captured the men - you have nothing to
fear." David said, trying to be optimistic.  "I'm not
afraid, that's not the problem. The problem is that my
school is ruined. Everyone knows that the reason Neil was
killed was because he left the cove, went to college, and
came back with new ideas that the cove wasnt ready to
accept. So how am I to encourage the children to leave
the cove and go to college? They're going to tell me
to look at what happened to Neil, and that they don't
want that to happen to them. And how will I argue with
them?" I questioned in dispair.  "We'll get through
this. The doctor was just one person - we'll have to
convince them that -" "Convince them of what? That it wont
happen to them? David, I never thought it would happen
to Neil, and I was taken hostage once because someone
threatened him . Even after that, I didnt think anyone
would actually do such a thing.So, how can I promise them
that nothing will happen to them? There's no garentee."
David kept quiet after this, knowing that no matter
what he said, I wouldnt feel better. I had to deal with
this part by myself - no one else's word would heal me.
*****************************************************************

Chapter 15 ***************

As I laid in my comfortable bed in my cabin and cried,
I watched David prepare his sermon for tomorrow's
funeral. The kerosene lamp was bright, and from where I was
laying, it looked like it was generating all around David,
giving me a heavenly picture. To me, David was an angel. He
had put up with so much the last few days, and never
complained. I knew David was having a hard time. Every
now and then, he'd let out a low groan or mutter angry
words about him not being able to get it right. A lot
of pressure had been placed upon him, he was preparing
a funeral sermon for a man that was a hero to most of
these people. Nevertheless, he couldnt refuse Miss Alice's
tearful plea.  I watched David's grip get tighter on the
locks of hair that he had trapped in his hands on the sides
of his head. A groan came out, and I knew that the tension
was building up.  "Pray, David." I said softly in a sweet
voice. Taking his hands away from his head, he turned
to me.  "Thanks Christy... I love you." He whispered,
then turned back to his work.  I dreaded tomorrow. I
didn't know how I'd pull through. So far, I could say
Neil, and I could say the word funeral, but I could
not put the two together. I was still so shocked about
all of this happening. I just wasnt ready for tomorrow.
*************************************************************
It was hard to hike up the muddy trails, but I still
wished that it took longer to get to our destination. I'd
deal with the pain and hardship physically, as long as I
could put off feeling it emotionally. Margaret and Miss
Alice were ahead of  David and I, leading the way to the
ceremony. By the amount of people, I could have sworn
that all of Cutter Gap, Lufty Branch, Raven Gap, El Pano,
and all of the other coves that Neil had doctored to was
following behind. It was a stormy day, dark clouds loomed
above, sprinkling us with rain. The weather was suitable
for everyone's mood.  Once we were approaching the hideous
hole in the ground, with the cedar wood casket above it,
everything started hitting me at once. This was real. This
was actually happening.
 Everyone gathered around, the children up front. David,
at the head of it all, got ready to start. I stood
near by, about 5 feet away from him to make him stand
out more. Margaret and Miss Alice, on the other side
of him, did the same. I felt so bad for Margaret. With
her hands on her expanding stomach, a tear in her eye,
and her mother's arm around her, she looked devistated.
As David read his sermon, I looked around. Every one of
my schoolchildren were here, and everyone, even Lundy,
was crying.  Mountie came over to me. Her big blue eyes
were magnified by her tears that welled there. She opened
her mouth to say something, but she was too choked up to
do it. Instead, she buried her head into my side. I wiped
away my own tears and stood straight, trying my best to
be strong for her.
 But as the ceremony wore on slowly, I knew that if I wasnt
needed as support for David and Mountie wasnt holding me in
place, that I would have ran as fast as I could from here.
Finally, David shut his bible. The casket was lowered and
the flowers thrown on top of it. When the men started
shoveling the dirt on top, everyone started leaving. I
watched as my husband helped out. I stood firmly now, as
if my feet were rooted in the ground. I could no longer
feel the rain drizzle upon me, or the biting wind agaibst
my face, ir the annoying stands of hair streaming axorss
my face, because I was too busy trying to  fathom that
Neil's body was really in that casket.I felt my body go
completely numb. It couldnt be - not my Neil. Not the big
burly mountain man that has fought so hard in life to make
his own way. He couldnt be in there, that couldnt be his
body being buried. I tried to imagine it - I couldnt no
matter how hard I tried. It just couldnt be possible. So
many scenes of my life before this tragity happened.  " You
did nothing wrong - it was me, I was wrong - wrong for
accusing you. I was just angry that you cared so much for
Dan Scott." He had said comforting on those school steps.
"Why?" I had asked perplexed.
 "Because it wasnt me."  * "I wonder if   it's Dan that
you're so worried about or yourself.  "Oh Miss Huddleston,
your thought process never ceases to flummox me."
"For the first time since your wife left you you would be
allowing someone else into your life. Someone who you'd
feel responsable for. Someone who you might grow to care
about."  "I wouldnt be so sure it was the first time."
* "Bessie told a lie at church, but she just told another
one now, but this time it was to protect me. Bessie did see
ne by the river - with Doctor MacNeill."  "That's true."
* I kept hoping that any minute, I'd be waking up from this
nightmare, but I never did. How could this man be dead? How
could I live on this earth without ever being able to see
his face again?  David, now finished burying the casket,
came up to me, and wrapped his arms securely around me
from behind, as he laid his chin lightly on my shoulder.
"Everything is going to work out, I promise." He said
gently.  I just kept staring at the mound of churned
earth, and thinking about what laid just beneath it. If
not before, Neil was now officially dead; murdered;
killed. Neil was officially - gone.

Chapter 16****************

I stared out of the window back at the bunkhouse. David
 was asleep, sprawled out on the bed, even though it was
 only 1 o'clock. He had worn himself out, and had gotten
 little sleep last night.  The skies had cleared up, which
 only made me angrier at this world. Hpw could the sun be
 shining on such a horrible day? As a blue bird landed
 on the railing of the porch in front of me and began
 to whistle out a tune, I was reminded of a song that my
 mother used to sing, especially after my little sister
 Amelia died:
a€˜ Fly ye away from my window, little bluebird.  Fly ye as
far as ye can way from here.  And let not your sorrow fall
apon my ears, go spread your blue wings and I'll shed my
blue tears.  Let not your rays cast into my dark gloom,
yellow sunshine.  Waste not the warmth on the darkness
in here.  Trouble me not, go ye elsewhere.  Go light your
blue skies and I'll shed my blue tears.  For the one that
I have loved he has left me and gone.  And I'm in no mood
for the sunshine today For I don't know when, or if ever
again I will see his sweet face but I fear, it's forever
goodbye so I sit here and cry, these painful blue tears.'

As I looked at my surrondings, I could not keep in
a modified verse in a hushed whisper.  " I wont see
his sweet face again and I know that it's forever
goodbye, and so I sit here and cry these heartbreaking
tears."  I sighed when I seen the bluebird fly
away after I had finished, as if he understood.
******************************************************************

Chapter 17*****************

"Christy, Christy, help me, come quick!" I heard Margaret
scream from upstairs. It was 2 months after her husband's
funeral, and we had moved her in with us. David had
even just finished her new upstairs bedroom, down the
new hallway from our bedroom. I was missing David - he
had gone to Lufty Branch yesterday, and needed to stay
overnight - due to a death. I now jnew how much comfort
was needed after a death of a loved one, no matter
who it was, so I didnt complain. I put down the tray
carrying everything needed for tea. I went as quickly as
I  could up the steps. I was now 9 months pregnant, and
was strictly warned to take it easy. But how could I with
such a shrill like that?  "What is it Margaret?" I asked,
flinging her door open. She was on the bed perspirating
heavily as she took short but quick breathes.  "I think
my water just broke." She said worriedly.  "But you cant
- you're not in labor yet."  "Yes I am.I've been having
contractions for a good nine hours now."  "Why didnt you
tell me?" I exclaimed, rushing to her side.  "I difnt
know if they were real. Christy, I'm barely 8 months."
"It's alright, its rare that twins go the full length. How
are you feeling?"  "Take a guess - my water just broke,
and I'm getting ready to deliver twins!"  Then, Margaret
started letting out ear-piercing screams as she pushed.
"Can you help me?" She cried.  "Yes, just hold on. Before
I wanted to do teaching, I wanted to be an obsratrition
nurse. Let me remember this." I said, putting my hands
over my face and squinting my eyes.  ******** "Head's out,
Margaret. Come on, almost through."  "No Im not, I still
got another one to get out of me!" She exclaimed. I was
glad that she took a short break from her screaming, but
she went right back to doing it again. The baby inside of
me kicked and moved around because of it, making me nearly
double over in pain at every move.  "Margaret, please,
stop screaming. The baby is hurting me."  " That's nothing,
try pushing it out. Then talk to me about pain!"  The baby
kicked me again.  "Please Margaret!" I said, pain ripping
through me. Actually, it really wasnt that the baby was
kicking hard, but that I have been feeling contractions for
hours now as well. I could only hope that it would induce
further labor to far. Finally, the first baby was out.
"Congradulations - it's a girl." I said, carrying her
over to the changing table to wipe her down. Did the baby
have to cry so loudly?  "My water broke again!" Margaret
yelled.  "What? No, you have to give me a minute to finish
the first one!" I said distressed.  "Tell that to the
one forcing it's way out!"  "Come on, Margaret, twins
shouldnt literally be at eachother's feels. Just wait!"
"Well, these twins are, and I cant wait!"  Finally, I had
the new little girl wrapped in blankets, then set her down
in the crib. "Please let the next one be a boy, God. We
need a boy to carry the name" I prayed.  Rushing over to
Margaret again, I told her what to do. Within minutes,
the baby was out .  I took this baby over to the changing
table as well, and wiped it down, doing my best with all
the pain that I was in. I could feel the baby moving
lower and lower.  "Is it...a boy...or girl?"Margaret
asked, completely worn out.  "It's a boy, Margaret, it's
a boy."  *************************** I was going down the
steps to get Margaret water. My apron was bloody from the
births. I didnt care about changing though, I was hurting
to much. But just as I was walking through the parlor,
I felt my water break.  "No Lord, not yet! David's not
home yet!" I pleaded, but it was no use. I hobbled over
to the davenport and laid down on it, not being able to
stand the pain any longer.  "Christy, I'm home. Everything
okay?" I heard David's voice.  "David..." I whispered.
"Christy? Oh good Lord!"  ********************* "It's a
girl, Christy." David announced excitedly after the baby
was out. He held it close for a moment, then started
to wash her.  "We never came across a girl name." He
continued.  I remembered last month. Margaret had given
me Neil's family bible, saying that it would mean more
to me than it would to her. Of course, knowing that his
children were on the way, I refused it, but told her that
we could share it together. The first page had names and
birthdates of Neil's relatives, going back to his great
grandfather. It listed all of his siblings, and gave me
plenty of ideas for names. There was one though, that stood
out from all the rest.  "I was reading the announcement
page of Neil's bible last month, and found a name that I
really liked. It's the name of Neil's mother - Catherine
Rose."  But as soon as I said it, I gasped loudly.
"What is it?" David asked.  "Neil told me to take care of
Catherine Rose. How did he know?"

Chapter 18******************

"Can you believe we've been married for 19 years?" I asked
David, my arms wrapped lovingly around him. "And that
we're getting old? I mean - I'm 38 now!"  "Christy, 38
isnt old at all." David laughed.  " But 45 is." I said
mischieviously.  "Hey now, I'm not old!"  I giggled. We
were standing near the closest wall to the door in the
parlor. Margaret sat on a rocking chair in the corner
with a smile as she watched the children. My oldest girl,
Catherine Rose, stood in the middle of the room, holding
tight onto her husband's arm of 2 days. Neil MacNeill
junior stood proudly next to his wife, adoring her. Neil
was almost an exact look alike to his father. He was
tall and burly, had sandy red hair and sharp hazel eyes.
David and I had five more children - Amelia Lynn - 17,
Emmaline Margaret -12, Julianne Rudd - 8, and little
Sarah Lydia - just 2. We only had one boy, Dade William
Grantland - now an amazing 15.  "When will you be coing
back?" Julianne asked her brother-in-law. The Grantland
children and the MacNeill children had no relation, but to
them, they all were close siblings. Margaret and the twins
had moved into Miss Alice's cabin next door when the twins
were 2, but the cabin burned down and we gladly took them
back in again to stay.
 "Anywhere from 2-4 years." Neil Scott answered.  "Will we
see you anytime before that?" Amelia - nearly in tears
asked.  " I don't know."  Neil Scott and Catherine were
making Scotland their home for the next few years. For as
long as any one could remember, Neil Scott wanted to be
a doctor and follow in his father's footsteps. Therefore,
he was going to go to medical school in Scotland, at the
same one his father did.  Catherine Rose followed in my
footsteps. She was going to use her time training to be
a teacher. Catherine was wonderful with children, and I
knew she'd make a great teacher. After the two of them were
finished with schooling, they were going to come back here
to work. The two were leaving today, in just a few minutes.
"Cant you let Catherine and Millie go together and you
stay with me? Them too, I wont miss, but you cant leave
me here with all of these woman folk!" Dade begged.
"David William Grantland, apologize to your sisters." I
said sharply.  "Sorry. But it aint fair!"  I felt bad for
Dade. He had adopted Neil to be his big brother. And Neil
Scott never left the house without taking his a€˜little
Dade.'  "Neil, we got to get going before the train leaves
without us!" His young wife said, pointing to the clock.
"You're right." He said, then let go of his wife to go wish
his mother goodbye. I spotted Elisabeth Alice, his twin,
in the corner, next to tears. She was gorgeous, with her
soft, thick, wavy brown hair flowing down her back. Bright
blue eyes, full of tears, stared at her brother. Neil
ran to her, wrapping his arms around her. They had always
been close, always there to help eachother.  " Don't cry
Beth, I'll be back." He soothed. She wiped her tears away.
"That's it, be brave and strong."  My mouth flew open. Did
Neil Scott really just say that? I looked up at David,
and he knew what I was thinking.  " Take care of my
mother and sister now, Dade. I'm leaving them in your
care. Neil  went on. He bent down and all of the girls
ran into his arms. Sarah put her head down on his shoulder
and cried. After a few moments, she removed it, and he let
them all go.  " Take good care of our family, alright? I
don't know what I'd do without them."

 I couldnt believe how much the man that stood before me
resembled his father, who would be so proud of his son
right now. I nodded.  "Take care of my girl." I said, tears
welling in my eyes.  " You have my word on that."  And with
that, he took Catherine, who had said her goodbyes at the
same time, and they ran out the door. Taking Catherine's
horse princess, mare of the old stallion Prince, they rode
off together, with David riding behind him so he could
take princess back home.  Margaret and I walked onto the
porch, leaving the children inside to get out their tears.
"I wish Neil was here to see his boy set off in his tracks
to a new life." Margaret said, tears coming down freely.
" He is, Margaret, he promised that he would."  "Christy,
you never said much about Neil's last words. Would you
mind telling them to me now?"  I nodded. "He told me to
take care of you. He blessed my marriage with David, and
told me to take care of myself for my family. Margaret,
he talked mostly of you. He was upset to be breaking
his promise to you."  "What promise?"  "He said that he
told you that as long as you don't leave, he wont either."
She let out a sob.  "He told me to be brave and strong, and
that he'd watch over all of us."  "Neil Scott said the same
thing today - be brave and strong.I heard you let out a
sob, is that why?"  "Yes, because I know that Neil is still
with us. Neil is keeping his promise, and part of him is
living inside of your son. Margaret, he told me once that
there are holes in the floor of heaven - I didnt believe
him then, but I do now."  We looked to the sky. The sun
made a golden outline on an opening in the sky.  a€˜No, I
cant leave you - I'll be with you always'. Those were the
words that echoed through my body as I stared upwards. I
looked over at Neil's wife and nodded.
 Neil was right, and I now knew that Neil had been with me
from the moment he died, through every time I cried, to
Margaret's birth, through everything up to now, and that
he'd always be there for me.  Yes, Neil had been there
this whole time. ~*~
          ~*~The End~*~ * For Now...*
                                                 ************

Note: Maybe it wasnt David that took over my mind... =)
Any comments or questions that you may have, please feel
free to contact me at: Homespundreams15@aol.com I hope you
enjoyed my story, and that it was worth all the tears that
I literally cried from having to kill Neil, and having to
write about life after his death.~*~